Pretty Little Liars on ABCFamily has become as frustrating as it has been addictive to me. The teenage girls who have perfectly coiffed hair, wear movie star makeup and designer outfits smack of original Beverly Hills 90210 from my *ahem* childhood. In addition to the adult content (hello teacher-student “love” sitch, the remorseful cheating parent, parties that include more than fruit punch) there’s a massive murder mystery, extortion, and felony theft wrapped into the weekly storyline. The life of the teenagers in this Pennsylvania town is very different than the my memory of teenage existence. Let’s have a recap of what we know so far, yes?

There’s a dead girl.

Her name was Alison, from the flashbacks we know that she was a pretty nasty b*tch. Controlling, rude, conniving, rich, a tease, a brat and our victim. The “leader” of the 4 main characters (Aria, Spencer, Emily and Hanna) was murdered. There’s an ongoing investigation into her death with the entire town presuming that the “outsider” Toby Cavannaugh is to blame. Obvious to the viewer, he’s not.

There’s a mysterious figure.

Since the 4 friends have a “secret” (they were drinking the night Alison was murdered and they witnessed Alison committing a crime in which another girl, Jenna, was blinded) they haven’t been honest with the authorities. Now they are tormented by an anonymous person “A” who miraculously knows everything going on in their private lives. “A” continues to torture The Liars by threats, theft, and general manipulation. Every week, and I mean every week there are new possibilities on who “A” could be. I wouldn’t suggest a PLL drinking game for possible “A” because before the first 25 minutes of the episode are finished, you’d be hammered.

There have been so many new characters introduced every single episode that I can barely keep up! Unlikely allies in random new characters is becoming a regular occurrence. From the new bad boy to the geek, there have been a lot of new random people coming into the light and it’s getting predictable. I’d like to see some consistency for a few episodes at least. Truth be told, I did sing a little bit of The Facts of Life theme song happily at the end of last weeks episode.

Who could be “A”??

Well, at this point there’s few things that we know.

1. It’s probably a female. The show has been careful to only show small bits of the “A” characters’ physical being. Black leather gloves have been seen many times, but not too much else. There was an end scene where “A” stoked a fire and the calves seemed very thin and delicate, not always female attributes, but hey, it was the outline of legs for crying out loud!

2. This person has a lots of time to observe; possibly has bugged the homes/rooms/lockers/cars/bathrooms/underpants of everyone in the town! There is nothing “A” doesn’t know! It’s very disconcerting, I’m waiting for “A” to send a text letting one of the main characters know that their time of the month is starting in 3 minutes! It’s getting to be a bit much.

3. This person could actually be persons! This could be a team! It’s hard to believe that one person could be everywhere at once.

At this point in the season, I need a gimmie. I’ve been loyal, I’ve bought in, I need some payoff. I’m going to need an episode that gives me something more than a shadowy figure. I’m going to need some sort of indication that I’m on the right track as far as who “A” is. Don’t let me down, Pretty Little Liars! Give me something to go on! I’ll be watching, with baited breath!

Check out an all new episode of PRETTY LITTLE LIARS tonight on ABC Family at 8/7c – “Je Suis Un Ami” – the sharks circling in the water are not just the Rosewood swim team. And stay tuned for an upcoming character run down from Courtney K, for those of you who are just as confused about all of these new people as we are!